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How to calm down quickly when you’re upset

In this video, you'll

  • learn about the value about calming down quickly and being in control of your emotions,
  • discover three easy techniques to calm down in any situation, and
  • realize that, with a bit of practice, you, too, can be more calm and mindful.

Before you dive in, there's a few things I want to share with you.

First of all, the methods I'm teaching you have been shown to work in many research studies.

They will work for you, too. 

But you do need to practice them a bit so you can effectively use them when you need them.

Make it a habit to do some breathing exercises or guided imagery before you go to sleep. Not only will you fall asleep faster, but you'll also have these methods at your disposal during the day.

You can also easily do these exercises together with your partner or children. Anyone can benefit from relaxation techniques. I do guided imagery with our children at bedtime, and not only do they love it but it helps them fall asleep faster.

If you like the relaxation exercises and want more, let me know by email or in the comments. We do them every day and I have much to share if you are interested.

If you want to quickly jump to one of the three techniques, here they are:

Simple Breathing Technique

Butterfly Breathing


Guided Imagery

Selected references

Balters, S., Mauriello, M. L., Park, S. Y., Landay, J. A., & Paredes, P. E. (2020). Calm Commute: Guided Slow Breathing for Daily Stress Management in Drivers. Proceedings of the ACM on Interactive, Mobile, Wearable and Ubiquitous Technologies, 4(1), 38:1-38:19. https://doi.org/10.1145/3380998

Gruzelier, J. H. (2002). A Review of the Impact of Hypnosis, Relaxation, Guided Imagery and Individual Differences on Aspects of Immunity and Health. Stress, 5(2), 147–163. https://doi.org/10.1080/10253890290027877

Hopper, S. I., Murray, S. L., Ferrara, L. R., & Singleton, J. K. (2019). Effectiveness of diaphragmatic breathing for reducing physiological and psychological stress in adults: A quantitative systematic review. JBI Evidence Synthesis, 17(9), 1855–1876. https://doi.org/10.11124/JBISRIR-2017-003848

Naik, G. S., Gaur, G. S., & Pal, G. K. (2018). Effect of Modified Slow Breathing Exercise on Perceived Stress and Basal Cardiovascular Parameters. International Journal of Yoga, 11(1), 53–58. https://doi.org/10.4103/ijoy.IJOY_41_16

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